A House of Horrors- Ruby Franke

I have spent all week watching and listening to videos about Ruby Franke. It has captivated me, as it has millions of others.

And for good reason. She was a "parenting expert" who had millions of subscribers on Youtube. Her and her partner, Jodi, charged families hundreds of dollars to "coach them."

The more I watch, the more I cringe.

She was a "by the book", take charge, authoritative parent. Her way or the highway. No grace. No room for mistakes from her children. Harsh, controlling, and smart. But also, dumb. She documented her abusive ways in her diary, and eventually her 12 year old son escaped, where he found a neighbor who called authorities. Ruby and Jodi pled guilty to child abuse and are now serving time in prison.

My take away?

Be careful who you take advice from.

Here was a mom, who by all appearances, had her act together. She had her ducks in a row. She had her kids and home in order.

But she didn't.

Those who try to convince you that they have all the answers usually don't.

I am worried when I see parents who think that raising good kids will happen when you follow a checklist, listen to all the parenting advice, and check every box.

I am worried when I see someone offering advice who acts like they know everything.

The longer I parent, the less I know.

I do have people that I look up to and admire, but it's people who I know in real life, have observed personally, and have witnessed the relationship that they have with their kids.

I pause to take the parenting advice of some guru who has miserable kids. I refuse to take the advice from someone who doesn't have a relationship with their kids. I balk at taking advice from someone whose kids have gone down a different path than I want my kids going down.

Wisdom is justified of all her children.

Do you know who I take advice from?

Those who have raised kids who love the Lord.

Those who have raised kids who love them.

Those who have healthy relationships with their kids.

Those who have kids that speak well of them. Speak highly of them. Speak of how they love the Lord, and how their relationship with him was real.

Those who convince their kids that the Christian life is the best life to live. Those whose kids follow the path they were raised in. Those whose kids don't reject every principle and Bible command as soon as they turn 18.

And if I can't even convince my own kids that this life is the best life, why am I trying to have any kind of "influence" at all?

More and more people are realizing that social influencers are fake. No perfect home exists. No one has their act totally together.

Having a small platform, (very small, lol) I have faced criticism for not doing things that other Baptist families do, or doing things that other Baptist families don't do. And I don't care, because I am not putting on a facade to impress others. My goal in life is not to convince everyone how I am the "parenting expert."

My goal as a parent is raising children who love God, glorify him, love me, love their dad, love their siblings, and love their families.

That's it. That's my goal.

And I take advice from those who have accomplished that. In a world of social media influencers, be careful who you let influence you. We only get one shot at this raising kids thing. Let's do it right.