The Righteous Care For The Victims

Abusers cover for Abusers.

The righteous care for the victims.

It shouldn't be abnormal for kids to grow up in a home where they aren't screamed at, where they aren't scared, where they have zero doubts that their mom and dad love them.

It shouldn't be abnormal for a wife to have a husband who has never laid a finger on her in an angry way. Has never cussed at her. Is her best friend. It shouldn't be abnormal for there to be peace and tranquility in the home- where someone who says they are a Christian actually acts like a Christian.

Victims of domestic abuse are often afraid to come forward with the truth. They are told, "If you EVER tell anyone, you are dead!"

Then when they do come forward, they are mocked. Ridiculed. Told that they are lying.

They hear comments like-

"Your mom and dad would never do that, they are a pillar of the community! Your dad is a pastor, he would never act that way! Your mom is a saint, she would never do something like that!"

They start to doubt themselves, even though they carry scars- emotionally, physically, and deep within their memories.

They are cut off from their family, and deep inside, they long for a relationship with those that hurt them- because as messed up as it sounds, you can't stop loving those that God put in your life.

Your mom is always your mom.

Your dad is always your dad.

They start to feel like they have no voice. They go to pastors, friends, adults- begging for the chance to be heard.

And no one listens.

But some do.

I am against abuse in any form.

Hitting your wife is abuse. Full stop.

Using over the top punishments against children is abuse. Full stop.

Name it whatever you want- spousal discipline, corporal punishment taken to the next level with painful implements, your "right" as a husband (garbage) - IT IS ABUSE.

Men who don't know how to lead will use abuse as a form of control. They will belittle, and slap, and hit, and mock and yell and scream.

They will hit their wife in an attempt to control, and all it does it proves how very insecure they are in their manhood and their ability to lead.

Real men recognize women as the weaker vessel. They realize their role as protector, lover, provider.

Strong men realize their strength, and they *never use it in a way to hurt the wife that God gave them. They never use their strength to hurt their children in any way.

Strong pastors lead by being a voice for those who are abused.

They don't care about backlash or public opinion, no matter how loved and admired the abuser is.

Strong pastors say what needs to be said, without fear of repercussion. They stand strongly on the Word of God.

Right is right. Wrong is wrong. No matter who says otherwise.

Strong pastors listen to both sides, pray about it, and make their decision- unwavering in their support of the victims. They listen to the small, still voice telling them- they are speaking truth. And then they stand on conviction.

Weak pastors bend to public perception. They twist Scripture to fit the narrative that they want. They come up with weirder and weirder excuses and scenarios to cover what they know in their heart is wrong.

They bully those standing against the abuse. They mock and belittle and lie and slander about the character of those standing against abuse.

They make light of abuse and trauma.

As Christians, we are called to help the weak. Help the traumatized. Help those who have been hurt.

As parents, we exhibit healthy relationships to our children.

Men, you show your sons how to be strong men in how you treat their mother, love their mother, protect their mother.

Wives, you show your daughters how to be good moms someday, by loving them fiercely, guiding them, training them in a patient and loving way.

May we never become so weak as Christians that we ignore the suffering and pain of those going through or healing from abuse.

I will always be a voice for those who have none- those who feel threatened, bullied, and alone in this world.

And more importantly, God is on your side, too.

Ephesians 6:4 - And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Ephesians 5:28-29

28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

1 Peter 3:7

7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

Titus 3:2 - To speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, but gentle, shewing all meekness unto all men.

Psalm 11:5

5 The Lord trieth the righteous: but the wicked and him that loveth violence his soul hateth.